Memoir: Ren Dead

Led first away team to Chimaera.

Watched first man die under my command. Ship was gutted, of life and technology. Ambushed by Cylons, took a bullet to the hand. Ren hit next, took bullet to neck. Elijah Ren. Twenty years old. Good kid.

Dead under my command.

Should not have been me. Am an FTL geek, meant for tinkering, not command. Was never supposed to be under fire. Frakked up first opportunity to prove self. Ren dead, Sofia badly hurt.

Under my command.

Can't read figures now. See faces instead of numbers. Had meeting with Chief. Left with black eye. Will tell Gabrieli walked into a bulkhead when distracted. Should believe, knows how often I am distracted. Like when I should have saved the life of someone under my command.

What the frak am I doing here?

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